How Do I Stop Feeling Guilty That All Of My 1st Generation Caribbean Family Are Ir Dating?
I’m including myself in terms of dating out, but the guilt I have is that we are losing our culture, language, etc. when we date out, other than that, I have no problem with dating/marrying someone that makes me happy, no matter race/religion, etc…
Should I feel guilty that all of my brothers and sisters are dating out too and our family will forever be changed with this current generation?
November 30th, 2009 at 8:00 pm
It’s human nature to assimilate. Jews coming to america. Italians. Latinos. Blacks. We tend to lose our mother language by the second or third generation.
You only *lose* your culture if you let it go. It’s entirely possible to date someone from another culture and maintain your own.
You can also make the effort to keep your language in your family past the third generation. Props if you do. I wish my parents had.
December 1st, 2009 at 2:17 am
I see what you’re getting at, but are they happy? If they are then try not to feel guilty but I get where you’re coming from. Not in a harsh way, but aren’t you being a bit hypocritical? You say you also date other races but you don’t really want your family to?
As long as you and your family are happy with whoever they’re with then it’s alright. However you have a right to feel guilty of course, just try not to let it get in the way of any decisions you make.
December 1st, 2009 at 3:55 am
Just because your kids will turn out mixed doesn’t mean you’ll have to lose your culture. Just make sure to pass on your language, customs, and traditions to the next generation. A lot of my second and third cousins are mixed and most of them speak Chinese and know the customs because my cousins (their parents) have made sure to teach them.
December 1st, 2009 at 10:29 am
Could be considered racist by not dating out, ya know.
December 1st, 2009 at 2:04 pm
but we are NOT
i share who i am with my partners…
i teach them about our hair our history and openly answer any questions they have
December 1st, 2009 at 6:46 pm
You have nothing to feel guilty about, get your white man girl.