What Do I Do If I Hack Into My Husbands Email And Find Out That He Has Been Signinging Up To Dating Websites?
I hacked into my husbands email account and found out he has been signing up to dating services and singles websites, listing that he isnt married, (he is and we are expecting). It says he is looking for random hookups and etc but I dont know if he has actually met up with anyone. What do I do?
September 15th, 2009 at 9:32 pm
I’m sorry you’re in this situation. Take control. Set up a fake profile (say..Emily) on that site–one that he’d bite on. Get him to start talking to you via email and give you his address. Then, from the fake woman, send yourself an email with all his emails to “her” explaining that she did some investigating and found that he was a married scoundrel. She wants to prove to you that this is true so she’s arranged to meet him in a place that’s public. When he arrives he’ll find YOU there waiting for him with all “her” emails. Tell him you know all about Emily because she contacted you after she found out he was married and to prove it she sent you to meet him. Sounds sneaky but you’ll have proof and find out if he wants to fess up and straighten up.
September 15th, 2009 at 10:07 pm
Hmmm…. Well, I am no expert but three things do come to mind.
First, it would be absolutely wonderful if you apologized to your husband for hacking into his email because that is a serious violation of trust that neither of you need.
Second, you might benefit tremendously if you worked on improving your communication with your husband and I always find it easiest to start with common ground that is a agreed upon first and then slowly work to and through the tense areas of disagreement.
Third, it might hasten your success if you found a trusted and unbiased person to be with both of you while you access and process each other’s boundaries and emotions.
September 16th, 2009 at 2:59 am
I can’t believe some of the crappy answers people give on here. This woman has just found out that her husband is a cheating b#stard and somehow she gets the blame for not being a good wife.
Maybe you shouldn’t have snooped on him and yes there obviously is a trust issue………WITH GOOD REASON!
You need to confront him. If you’re not happy with his answer, then either try to work through it or end it.
Don’t let him sideline you by allowing yourself to be blamed for looking through his email account. He has broken your marriage vows, not you.
September 16th, 2009 at 6:50 am
Wow that’s tough! I guess I would confront him about it and ask him..because if your not going to put a private detective then what else can you do!
Hes obviously a jerk when he lies about his not being married, I don’t know what it is with men when your pregnant its like if they go through the hormone stage and loose their minds!
Don’t stress yourself though because it affects your baby and personally men aren’t worth stressing over and affecting your child for it, so relax we live in a small world and secrets come out sooner or later enjoy your pregnancy and screw him.
September 16th, 2009 at 8:45 am
i’d keep an eye on the email and see what he’s up to…….. fuel for the fire later on……. you know you can’t trust him now so be sure to use protection…….if you confront him it doesn’t mean he’ll stop…. he’ll just change his passwords…….. if might be funny to go in and change his profile though…….hook him up on the gay site or something! (No offense meant to the gays out there. ) Then I’d copy his profile and send it to his friends….. and sit back and watch!!!!! Maybe even include a picture of him……
September 16th, 2009 at 10:42 am
confront him. There should be enough trust between the 2 of you that it shouldn’t even matter if you go through his email. There shouldn’t be anything to hide. Tell him that if he isn’t happy with you then he needs to get the hell out of there. He’s stupid. He has a pregnant wife who loves him, and there he goes fu***** it up.
September 16th, 2009 at 11:55 am
why would you go to your husbands email in the 1st place?
Theres clearly a trust issue here. When you talk to him about it, hes going to blame you for not trusting him. It would be best to leave
September 16th, 2009 at 1:31 pm
could just be curiosity. I would be on guard, but I wouldn’t say anything. Just be careful.
September 16th, 2009 at 2:59 pm
confront him. maybe he feels ignored that your busy with the baby and stuff..im not saying hes right bu talk to him w/o getting angry and the tears. good luck!
September 16th, 2009 at 4:36 pm
Throw the bum out.
September 16th, 2009 at 11:01 pm
Try being a better wife.
September 17th, 2009 at 4:43 am
confront him. i would divorce HIM. you do not deserve that. he is looking to cheat.
September 17th, 2009 at 7:34 am
ask him…
September 17th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
leave
September 17th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
become a better wife so he doesnt have to cheat
September 17th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
You need to just get one piece of evidence then talk to him without judgement. He is using this as a stress release most likely but you’ll have to get some assurance that he didn’t start rendevous with anyone. The internet is just a fantasy until it becomes reality, and thats first with phone, txting then the meeting. I would find a counselor to talk with both of you to help out with his commitment and trust issues and that being honest is one of the most loving things you can offer you partner. Help him repair this trust if you can. But the dating thing is very addicting and full of excitement, especially if your married and you are going to have a baby. But this is sending him in self-destruct mode. If you can help him through this mind f**k you will do well to save your relationship. He must get a grip on his real life and find out why he is unhappy and what stressors are triggering him to use this as an outlet. Try to be understanding and develop some checks that you can use with his full awareness that will get him back to real life with you. If that’s not what he wants, the other decision is to Divorce and he needs to understand that too. You can’t have both. and now his emotional energies are being diverted into these fantasies. Being kind and helping him get out of this and back towards his family with you will be one of the most important things you will do in this relationship. This is serious. Treat it with the utmost care, intelligence and maturity you can muster. Know that once the emotions are taken out of the formula, he will lose interest. Here is a wild suggestion, ask him to get one of these dates to meet him at both your place so you can talk to her too and find out what he really wants and that he is deceiving these other potential mates also. They are most likely honestly trying to find a B/F and he is lieing to them also. This will get him no where ever.